Braving One Day At A Time

Today I braved taking the kids to the park, granted I knew I was meeting friends there that could and would help if things got out of hand.  But we made it.  The kids ran rampant, got all sweaty, and did a lot of sliding.  There were a few times Juniper tried to make a beeline for the street but a loud "uh uh uh" from me or my friends stopped him.  You could actually see him trying to figure out in his mind if it was worth disobeying four women vs. just one mom.  Three out of the four times he turned around and went back to the play area. 

The fourth time he was running past the sand volleyball quart toward the busier street and an oncoming monster lawnmower. We called for him to stop and this time he thought about it and then kept running. Thanks to a lighter body and being prepared with running shoes I caught up to him long before the super park lawn mowing machine got near. "Poor" little guy was stuck sitting with mommy until it was time to go.

Well practice makes perfect and today showed that we're a little closer with our practice.  Thursday we're going to brave taking the kids to the new aquarium with a bunch of other special needs families. We'll see how they brave that one.

The Car Wash Monster

After going to exercise group this morning my kids and I hit the gas station. Oh a whim I decided to splurge for the cheapest car wash. I thought the kids would get a kick out of it.  I never saw such diverse reactions, yet so in line with each child.

Rose - Laughing. "The car is being tickled."

Cyprus - Clearly thinking I wonder how I can take this all apart to see how it works.

Juniper - Screaming/Crying I don't like this. The cars being eaten by a monster!  Get me out of here.


So next time you think of surprising your kids with a unique treat think first about whether or not it will give your child nightmares (and then maybe do it anyway).

What do you do. . . ?

What do you do if you have a drama child?

Today I had one that was playing with my Kindle and when it ran out of power started screaming (literally) "I'm doomed. I'm doomed. I'll never play a game ever again."

This has happened all day long in regards to a number of things and I'm just at a loss on how to handle.

So. . .ready . . .go, what do you do to handle a child that makes everything into an extreme drama issue?

Trusting Yourself

This post is more about me than my wonderful family, however it can apply when having to deal with specialists or doctors regarding anyone.  In recent months my heart has been beating faster than normal, they call it tachycardia, but the doctors have been unable to narrow down the root cause.

"It may be this. . . "

"Or it may be that. . . "

"You should give up these medications. . . "

"Oh but the repercussions would be bad if you gave up those medication. . . "


What it comes down to is listening to my mother-in-law who told me to listen to myself.   I know my family. I know me and my history. As brilliant as doctors and specialists are they don't know me as well as I do.  If something about their opinion doesn't "feel" right or sit well with you, then listen to your heart and trust your instincts.

So I'm going to trust myself and keep doing what I'm doing to get healthier.

As for my kids I once had someone tell me they though little Juniper was "normal", but I'm glad I listened to my heart these last few months. Whether or not he was "normal" when they saw him he is delayed now. So I'm glad that I listened to my heart and followed through on getting the help that I need.

So in the end trust your heart, your instincts, your conscience. . .whatever you call it, and go forth and conquer with no fear.

Drops of Awesomeness Potty Training Style

We have been spending the last 6 months trying to cut back costs wherever we can in order to live within our means. We've gotten to the point that there isn't much else we can cut out, except diapers.
So, in a moment of either bravery or insanity, we are potty training both boys at once.  Oh boy!!!!  Today is day 5 (I think - the days are merging together). 

One thing I am learning (or being reminded of) with potty training special need kids is that it is really hard for me not to get frustrated when they purposely go elsewhere other than the potty. I need to step back, reign in my emotions, smile and walk them through the steps again. I just need to show them each time where the poop and pee go, help them clean it up, smile, tell them I love them and that we'll try again next time.

I'm learning that I need to focus on the little wins, like "hey, they're learning to hold it a little more" as they run around butt naked.  And "hey, I got peed on less today". And "man am I glad we own a carpet cleaner."

No my kids aren't typical, but they are worth the time and effort.

Fireworks

Happy Independence Day everyone.

One thing I've learned through my short years as a mother of special needs kids is that you have to be prepared for anything (or at least be flexible).

Once or twice we tried to have the kids stay up to watch the fireworks displays. We live in a wonderful place where we don't even have to go anywhere to watch them. All we do is turn off the lights, meet in our bedroom and pile on the bed. Then, turning off the lights, we simply watch the fireworks out our bedroom window--no fights for parking, no worrying about whether, and if the kids are tired their beds are just feet away. However, they've only opted to watch fireworks with us twice during the time they have been a part of our lives.   Usually its too late at night for them and our kids find them scary instead of pretty.

The interesting thing about July 4th for our family living in Utah is that there are always fireworks anytime from the end of June through the end of July due to all the local towns special festivals & parades.  So each year I try and take time to sit each child on my lap and explain to them that they are going to hear loud bangs and pops outside at night and that its okay. We have to warn them in advance so that the loud noise doesn't bother them.  This year I've even propped Rose up so she can look out her window in case any of the neighbors set off their own fireworks.  We'll see how it goes.

Be The Best Mom For Today

For the last nine months or so I have been meeting with a counselor to help me learn how to cope with some of the craziness of my life. She has been an amazing help.  I met with her again today and we talked about some of the struggles of being a mom to three special needs kids. The difficulty is that each kid needs help in different ways and I often have difficulty adjusting between methods when all three kids need me at once.

She reminded me of something that I used to tell myself all the time long before I ever had kids. "Be the best you for today, whatever that means."  She modified it to "Be the best mom you can be for today. Your best maybe different from day to day, but never stop trying to be the best mom for whatever that means for today."

There are sometimes in life where we seem to handle things better. Then there are days where the littlest things throw our game totally off.  (In all honesty its the exact same thing for kids.) Our best will change each day. The goal is to figure out what your best is for today and work to be that.

So I have days where the tv is my lifesaver and the kids end up spending much to much time in front of it. But on those days I just try to make sure that whatever they watch is educational. Hence all the Team Umizoomi, Your Baby Can Read, Blues Clues, School House Rock, and They Might Be Giants videos that my kids watch.

Other days where my best as a mom is better then we can turn off the tv, go to exercise group, play with bubbles, or go to the park.  As for today, my best this morning was pretty good, but this afternoon went downhill. However, no matter the gear shifting I have to do, I will never give up striving to be the best mom for my particular kids.  They are pretty awesome kids afterall.